You try to make everything in their little world perfect. Â Before they even arrive, you’ve spent months planning out and creating that nursery. Â Once they get here, you promise you will be kind, gentle, and unlike your own mother, NEVER raise your voice at them. Â That was all fine and dandy, until they hit toddler-hood.
The average toddler is a force to be reckoned with. Â Being a child-free couple for almost 13 years, I remember well, looking at all the “bad” parents out there. Â The ones who let their kids scream up and down the aisles of the grocery store, the ones whose kids drew on their walls, the ones who just would “lose it”. Â I knew that if I ever was given the blessing of becoming a parent, that I would NEVER do any of these things. Â My child would be well-disciplined, a delight to all around, and I would have no trouble being patient!
Weeeeellllll, that all went out the window somewhere around the time Poppet started to crawl. Â I still had a social baby, but she was on the move, and into EVERYTHING!!!! Â The patience started to wear a little thin. Â Then it happened. Â I was shopping in Costco one day, and she saw a food sample stand. Â That’s when all calm and peace disappeared, and I suddenly became that parent who needed to fill the empty fridge at home with groceries, and was now pushing my shrieking child up and down every aisle. Â I could feel the eyes of other shoppers boring through me, “the bad parent”. Â Granted, none of them likely had children of their own (or just live in denial of what their kids were actually like – the little angels).
If there is one thing my child has taught me, it is that I am not going to be the perfect parent. Â Sure, I forgot to put a diaper on her after a changed her the other day, and found wet spots down the hall – oops. Â And, yes, I even have a child that I get frustrated with on occasion. Â But when I take a step back, and realize the blessing this child is, when I realize the complete individual she is in her own right, I am amazed at how much being the perfect parent doesn’t matter. Â When they put their little arms around you and spontaneously kiss the tip of your nose, it’s like they’re saying, “You’re the best parent I could ever wish to have!” Â And you know what? Â You are.
Warmest regards,
{j}
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The things we all imagine before we become parents…
Tat recently posted..Grateful for a first glance at my baby
I totally agree with you, we can never be perfect parents. However, we can give our best and hope that everything will turn out fine for our kids.
Sounds like your perfect enough to me!
Kimberly C. recently posted..A Blogging Mommy with a Vlogging Daughter?
How sweet are you?! :-) Thanks!
I love this post!:)) This is exactly how I feel! my 15 month old has just started with the tantrums:( so I dread taking her out in case it happens in public… Hopefully she is over this stage soon! But I have also learned I am not perfect:)
I adore this post! Just like when my mom sent me off to school for the first day of kindergarten in a dress…with no underwear. She’s still the best mom ever! Thanks for the encouragement to know that my kids will think the same of me, despite my mistakes along the way. No one’s perfect! And that makes the world more interesting :)
I believe we have all had your Cotsco experience. Mine happened at Target and Walmart. Nice reminder to new mommies ;-)
Kendall commented on Pardon My Poppet:
I am definitely not a perfect parent. I have a 3 and a 1 year old. While I have never experienced what you have in the stores, I do deal with my own problems at home. We have to hide every single pen, pencil, marker, crayon, chalk, etc. in the home because my 3 year old JUST DOES NOT STOP DRAWING EVERYWHERE. It does not matter how she gets disciplined, she thinks it’s worth it just to have that bit of fun. We do a lot of arts and crafts but she just does NOT get enough! UGH. This is my BIGGEST challenge with her.
You know it is so freeing giving up the “dream” of being a perfect parent. I used to pressure myself (and my kids) to live up to crazy unrealistic expectations. Over time and with God’s help I’ve mellowed out and now enjoy my kids (even when they’re acting like one of “those” children). :)
Shannon Milholland recently posted..Saddle Up
I am definitely not a perfect parent. I have a 3 and a 1 year old. While I have never experienced what you have in the stores, I do deal with my own problems at home. We have to hide every single pen, pencil, marker, crayon, chalk, etc. in the home because my 3 year old JUST DOES NOT STOP DRAWING EVERYWHERE. It does not matter how she gets disciplined, she thinks it’s worth it just to have that bit of fun. We do a lot of arts and crafts but she just does NOT get enough! UGH. This is my BIGGEST challenge with her.
Kendall recently posted..Blogger Sign ups for Kindle Fire June 15-29
How true! I think we all fall short of our own expectations when we have our own children. And now that we are living in reality, it’s our turn to give a frazzled mom with a screaming toddler a sympathetic smile, or maybe let them cut in front of us in line so that they can get their unhappy child home, instead of gaping at them in horror, like we might have done!
Thanks for sharing! I had my suspicions people forgot what it was like. Kinda comforting really! :-)
My children are not little anymore and just about grown. Now when I go to a public place, say Wal-Mart or the grocery store I find myself thinking ‘I can’t believe she is letting her child run up and down the isles.’ ‘Look at that kid throwing things in the floor, what is her mother thinking?’ Goodness, then I will walk away and it hits me, when my children were 2-4 years old they could be terrors in a store. They cried to get out of shopping carts, then cried to get back in. They were into everything, and at times it is hard to not run out of patients! I always worried I was never good enough for them, but a hug from them meant to me that ‘all was right with the world!’
Thanks for sharing! I had my suspicions people forgot what it was like. Kinda comforting really! :-)
Oh I remember thinking that way. I just knew I wouldn’t be like those obnoxious parents at Walmart that is running through the store as fast as they can with their shopping list as their kids are screaming. But it does happen and it doesn’t mean you are a bad parent. I just have more sympathy now when I see another parent with a screaming child.
I love this! I can not tell you how much I can relate. I believed I would have the most patient and easy kids because I knew how to parent them right and I would have patience so they would be patient with me. lol. I have a two year old who is really crazy and he was born like that. From the moment he was born, he has been all wild and all boy. I do try to have patience and keep him grounded and learning but their are days when we end up with a tantrum in the parking lot or where he just wants to take off everywhere we go and I’m running after him. lol. what a life, but I love my little guy so much! oh well, awesome post
Too true! Great post – it is difficult to overcome the judgement of others
Raine recently posted..Goals and Ambition
That was so honest and encouraging Joy. Thank you for your perspective. I feel more capable after reading this post.
Me too. Agreed!
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